When someone dies in your relationship circle, you quickly become the talk of the town.
I hate gossip and our world is filled with it. People spend money on magazines that are filled with gossip. It permeates our own lives too:
“I wonder how she doing since her husband died?”
“Did you see him? He looked awful – doesn’t look like he’s managing his life since he lost his wife.”
“I really don’t thing she’s coping very well since the death of her son.”
“She’s lost a ton of weight – must be her father’s death.”
“I heard she’s going to sell her house because it’s too big to live in all by herself.”
“What do you think will happen to the family business?”
“Can you believe it? I heard that he’s dating already!”
“I heard that the kids are fighting over his will.”
Gossip! What a waste of energy spent “wondering” when you could actually care.
Maybe someone should publish a grief gossip magazine with all the gritty details of other people’s loss. I have heard all of the above comments and they’ve made me wince every time.
Then what can we do besides wonder what is happening in a grieving person’s life, making assumptions based on rumors? It’s really simple: “Can you tell me a story about your husband today?”
It’s no longer gossip when you ask them. Because the information is coming from the person directly, you will be touched deeply and discover how they are really doing and where they are at in their grief.
As they grieve, people need to tell the story of love, of a life lived that was significant. They need to know that someone else is interested in the person who is no longer with them and the impact, influence and importance they were in their life.
Can you do that with someone? They really are waiting to share something special with you.