Those Eyes and Other Things I Really Miss

73022_437801291579_4041456_nWhen I first saw this picture of my wife Erica’s beautiful green eyes, I was totally captured. I wanted to gaze deeper into them and discover who she was. They grabbed me. They still do.

It’s quite amazing the things we take for granted about a person who is no longer physically present in our lives. When my first wife, Pam, closed her eyes for the last time, I cried. For almost 25 years, I had had the privilege of looking into those clear, blue eyes, but that was never to happen again. Continue reading →

Tsunami Grief: A one-hour warning

We were awoken abruptly at 3:50 am one morning this past week. There was loud banging on the front door of our ocean side condo. Startled and fearful of whom it might be, I hesitated to open the door. After the second round of loud knocking, I decided to open the door only to find myself face to face with a fire fighter in full uniform. So many things passed through my mind at that moment. His expression and his words were serious and intense. Continue reading →

Christmas Cookie Recipes: Embracing both the old and the new in grief

Christmas is a season of contrasts – it involves both old and new. For the grieving, it is also a time of the year that is mixed with sorrow and joy.

When families gather together this time of the year, they often experience a twinge of sadness as they are reminded that there is a person (or people) missing that used to be with us during this time of the year. Continue reading →

What Would They Say If They Were Present?

Bringing Your Loved One Into the Celebration

This month, I returned to parish ministry following a 4-year sabbatical. One of the individuals who encouraged and supported me to be a pastor when I was young was my first wife Pam who died 9 years ago.

There are many celebrations in life where we wish we could bring back a deceased loved one.

Do you ever find yourself in the middle of a celebration missing that person? Continue reading →